WHOM DO THEY MEAN?

From Atlas Shrugs:

Dear Abby,

My husband is a liar and a cheat. He has cheated on me from the beginning, and when I confront him, he denies everything. What's worse, everyone knows he cheats on me. It is so humiliating.
Also, since he lost his job three years ago he hasn't even looked for a new one. All he does is buy cigars and cruise around and jokes with his pals, while I have to work to pay the bills.
Since our daughter went away to college he doesn't even pretend to like me and hints that I am a lesbian. What should I do?

Signed,
Clueless

Dear Clueless:

Grow up and dump him. For Pete's sake, you don't need him anymore, you're a United States Senator from New York, act like it.